The Luddite 7

Posted by Janka 30/03/2009 at 12:02

Lately, it has happened a couple of times that a friend has mentioned a party, and it has turned out that the likeliest reason I was not invited was that I am not on Facebook. It has also happened that I have missed some interesting discussion, because it was on (Q/J)aiku, and just a couple of days ago I missed the information about the birth of a new daughter to a colleague, because the event was only announced on Twitter, the new parents understandably too busy to blog or email.

Whenever this happens, there is a momentary panic: HELP! Everything Important™ happens elsewhere! Right now too, something might be happening and I don’t know about it! It is just a question of time before everyone forgets about me!

Then I try to make it pass. I have my contacts, I have my presence, and there is no way in hell I can maintain contact to everyone I know or have known. I already have a blog, and I am on various IRC channels, and follow various community-specific forums, and I have an email address. As is, with all of those I cannot even maintain as much contact as I would like to all of those I would like to — my dearest friends, my family, some interesting people I would like to know better but never get around to. Would screaming my presence into the internet in the hope that others have more time to follow all that help? I find this unlikely.

If anything, I feel my social life needs less idling on IRC and forums, less places to poll to see if anything is happening Right Now, and more time to make things happen at leisure.

I remember that some years ago in one university students’ club we were, in all seriousness, very concerned that if we stop sending the announcement of society meetings to the student newspaper, students without email might be excluded. And yes indeed, if any students continued to not use email and web, by now they pretty much are excluded. Are there any such cases? I don’t know. I wouldn’t know. Are they less happy for it? Do they have difficulties passing time? Do they indeed have no friends left? I doubt it — but again, I wouldn’t know. Is Facebook or Twitter the new email? Will I disappear into obscurity without it? Is Everyone Else there discussing something Important right now? Why is no one saying anything on IRC? Where are they talking that I am not hearing?

Breath.

Theory: I will notice if I at some point have too much time and too little social life. Probably at that point I still have some friend left who can tell me where to find the rest of the guys.

Relevant:

  1. Rannva 30/03/2009 at 23:47

    Great post! I don’t have a Facebook account either, and I won’t. I am already trapped in the web as it is. I spend way too much time online, wasting a large part of my freetime and life. I have done this for years now, and I don’t want it to expand even more.
    Thanks for putting all this into words. I believe there can be a balance but it takes enormous willpower.

  2. Sarrig 31/03/2009 at 13:06

    I’ve noticed this same thing. I occasionally feel bad realising I’m not invited someplace because I am not in IRC (dropped it off because it made me idle wayy too much) and my facebook usage is now up again, just to “keep in touch”. (and I paradoxially hate it since it feels so odd and partially shalow. ;-)

    I wish people would be remebered of who they are, not if they can be mass posted facebook invites. ;-)

    I know, I’m oldfashioned gal at times, despite all web 2.0 hype and online gamerness.

  3. Janka 31/03/2009 at 14:55

    Thank you for the kind words.

    I always find it funny to call myself old-fashioned, too, what with the MMOGs and e-books. But communications-wise, sometimes I think I am.

    Or maybe the word is “lazy”.

  4. kersa 31/03/2009 at 17:27

    Thanks for bringing this up! I too have noticed that many people have disappeared from irc and are nowadays only chatting(?) in facebook. Lots of news and social happenings go by without me knowing. I don’t know if it’s selfish or egocentric but I like to think that if someone really wants to contact me, he/she will do so regardless of the medium.

  5. Pare 01/04/2009 at 08:16

    Good post, thank!

    What I find annoying with Facebook is that nowadays if I google up some old friend, the first link is usually to Facebook. Without an account there, it’s then impossible to check that page.

  6. ebu 02/04/2009 at 06:59

    Technoluddites of the world, unite!
    Except we can’t, we need a facebook page for that.

    They do say the service is very welcome for expats struggling to keep in contact, though. Haven’t swallowed that hook yet.

  7. Janka 02/04/2009 at 16:16

    Eep, it’s Ebu! :) Good to hear from you.

    I suppose Facebook is good for that: maintaining some contact, keeping your “hand on the pulse”. I wouldn’t know, of course.